Big Chill 2010

The weekend forcasted rain. Not a good start, however, I got fully into the festival mindset by going and buying a crap load of alcohol with my mate Paul. The trolley was full of cider, boxes of wine, crates of beer, blue shnide (fake RedBull...), vodka, mixers, beans, crisps, bread rolls, 24 club biscuits, corned beef and a massive bottle of salad cream.

Game on then. In the que we met a group from Aberdeen. I have never been to Aberdeen but from bumping into this group throughout the weekend (and seeing their 2p sized pupils) I imagine it is fucking mental.

With the tent pitched and chairs out, the drinking commenced. We had a spacious back garden and what with being sat in it, the respectful British festival goers, conscious of avoiding confrontation, found elsewhere to set up shop. We were then mercilessly invaded by the French and our camping space thus diminished.

There were only a handful of people on the line up that I was adamant in seeing and so I spent most of it sauntering about, checking out whoever might attract my aural interest. In general the festival was (and I must have used the word about 500 times) "Chilled". With my experience being multiple Reading and Benicassim's over the past five years it made a refreshing change to not have people pissing on/burning your tent or being sick from bad spanish pills.

From the people I hadn't heard of, The Black Seeds were particularly noteworthy. After some research it seems that Brett from Flight Of The Conchordes was once a member. Apparently they're chart topping in NZ and rightly so, although I can't see the dub-funk genre breaking through our mainstream drivel.

I think my highlight music wise was Newton Faulkner. Now, admittedly I have never been a huge fan but being the only real acoustic guitarist/singer-songwritery act on the bill I was dead set for this... Throw me a vowel...the guy smashed it. Playing string parts with his feet, an electronic kick drum, his insane tapping and his guitar banging made for one of the most interesting sets i've seen in a long time. I took a fair amount of inspiration from his ability to work the crowd, telling a story in a song build up to get people jumping. He ended with Bohemian Rhapsody and just tore the place apart - unreal, I implore you to go and see him if he is in your area.

Throughout the first two days of the festival there were murmurings of a human art installation taking place on the Sunday morning. Turns out it was Spencer Tunick. I was familiar with his work but didn't realise the magnitude of his fame. Turns out getting a load of people naked in a public place is a bloody lucrative business. So Paul, being the 'Life Experience' enthusiast, signs up for this demo. After a heavy saturday night caning the vino, true to form, Paul got up at 7am and walked off into the sunrise while I dehydrated in my polythene greenhouse. Some 4 hours later Paul returned (I was still asleep). Not only was he grinning from ear to ear he was covered from head to toe in royal blue body paint. After I nearly passed out from laughing he began to explain that this Tunick bloke had painted the 600 participants different colours and arranged them to form a protest picture of the Gulf of Mexico Oil Spill. After demonstrating his disdain for being part of a political endeavour he summed up his morning by saying 'Yeh I was just lay there for an hour with my cock on some girls face and she was just smiling'.

Here are one liners for some of the other people I caught:

MIA - Boring as hell, walked off. Didn't get paid due to causing a stage invasion and injuring security. What's the American word for stupid mare?
Easy Star All Stars - Paul and Sam didn't know any Floyd or Radiohead songs so this was a none starter.
Roots Manuva - About 10 times better than at Warehouse project last year. Fearsome set. His hype man was a tad annoying but hey ho.
Paloma Faith - Pleasantly surprised by her voice, performance and songs.
Lily Allen - Pregnant, this raised a laddish conversation to which we all came to the same conclusion. Paul lost his load when Professor Green came out - the expletives aren't repeatable.
Delta Maid - American country singer (when singing) - Riddled with scouse (when talking) Great songs!
Submotion Orchestra - Stunning ethereal vocal. LEEDS LEEDS LEEDS LEEDS LEEDS...

So there you go. It's a late post and i could probably go on forever but you get the picture. It's a festival; shit goes down, people get squiffy and Spencer Tunick gets to play puppet master.

The Glass Child

Just a quick one. A girl wrote this about me on her blog. It was a really nice thing to read about myself and made my bank holiday. Check it below -

THE GLASS CHILD